Heidi Montag is Sorry for Her Crappy Video

01:13 AM, Filed under: Home \ Celebrities \ Heidi Montag

I wasn't going to post Heidi Montag's new music video for her "song," Overdosin', because I fucking hate her, and her "music" is shit. She sucks, and all things connected to her suck. Including her fake tits, fake nose, fake lips, and fake boyfriend.

That being said, it turns out she's even more retarded than everyone thought, since she actually uploaded the wrong video to YouTube. That's right, the only reason I'm writing about her crappy video is so that you can laugh at it (even more than you would have originally laughed at it). Shit, she can't even lip-sync properly in a music video.

Watch the Video:

Heidi Montag Overdosin' Music Video

Lots more pictures of Heidi Montag looking like a slutty version of a 1980s Barbie Doll (but more plastic), after the jump.

Photo credit: pacificcoastnewsonline.com

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2008 MTV Movie Awards Mega Picture Post

01:37 AM, Filed under: Home \ Celebrities \ Heidi Montag

I didn't even know the 2008 MTV Movie Awards were on last night, but it wouldn't have made a difference, since I don't get MTV. But don't worry if you missed it, because MTV will be replaying the show all summer. Doesn't that make you feel better? I didn't think so. Anyway, here are all the hot young celebrities who showed up to promote their latest movie, or album, or whatever, by wearing short skirts, and putting on too much makeup, and winning meaningless awards.

Attendees include: Anne Hathaway, Audrina Patridge, Charlize Theron, Ellen Page, Emma Stone, Heidi Montag, Katharine McPhee, Kristen Stewart, Lauren Conrad, Lindsay Lohan, Liv Tyler, Meagan Good, Megan Fox, Paris Hilton, Rumer Willis, Tila Tequila, and Whitney Port. You know, the big stars.

Click here to see all the 2008 MTV Movie Awards pictures

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These Heidi Montag Bikini Pictures Are As Fake As Her Breasts

02:44 AM, Filed under: Home \ Celebrities \ Heidi Montag

Heidi Montag is just about as fake as they come, and these new Heidi Montag bikini pictures are a perfect example. Once again, her "life" has been scripted out for the cameras, and been poorly acted out. I don't even think Heidi Montag is a real person. I mean, you have to actually live your life, not just plan it out as a series of photo ops.

If you think about it (which you probably shouldn't), Heidi Montag is exactly like her breasts. Sort of okay to look at, but completely fake, and filled with a squishy, artificial substance. Also known as Spencer Pratt.

Prat: Slang term for ass. How fitting.

Photo credit: pacificcoastnewsonline.com

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Lauren Conrad Sex Tape Confirmed

11:54 AM, Filed under: Home \ Celebrities \ Heidi Montag

So, that annoying fake couple we all love to hate, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, were on The Tyra Banks Show and CONFIRMED the existence of the Lauren Conrad sex tape. Yes, that Lauren Conrad sex tape. Tyra asked, and Heidi and El Doucheo were more than happy to emphatically confirm that the tape did exist at one point (even though Lauren Conrad denied she had a sex tape). Whether it exists now they couldn't say, and wouldn't, since apparently there is some kind of gag order in place. I bet it's similar to the gag order I feel when I look at Heidi and Spencer.

Heidi said that Lauren's ex was trying to sell the tape, to which Spencer added that he would rather throw up than watch the tape. Again, Spencer is the douche of all douches. I don't care how boring Lauren Conrad is in bed, I'd still want to see that sex tape.

Watch the Video:

Lauren Conrad Sex Tape Confirmed

Photo credit: Getty Images

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Heidi Montag and Britney Spears Make Sweet... Music?

10:14 AM, Filed under: Home \ Celebrities \ Heidi Montag

Hey, wanna hear something really sad, and pathetic? Then take a listen to this new song featuring Britney Spears and Heidi Montag, called "Dramatic." Yes, that's right, the two most ridiculous figures in the "music" industry have joined forces in what can only be an attempt at mutual career suicide. Granted, Britney's career was over long, long ago, and Heidi Montag's music career has only ever existed in her own warped mind.

So, you feel like listening to just about the worst song ever recorded in the history of the Universe? You know you do. Oh, and don't forget about Heidi Montag's bikini music video, either. That one's a real gem.

Listen to the Song:

Britney Spears and Heidi Montag "Dramatic"

And here are some Heidi Montag pictures, because as much as she continues to become more and more plastic, at least she's not Britney Spears.

Photo credit: WENN

Link: Heidi Montag and Britney Spears Make Sweet... Music?

Heidi Montag's "Higher" Music Video is Horrible, Has Bikinis

11:18 AM, Filed under: Home \ Celebrities \ Heidi Montag

Oh. My. God. Worst. Music Video. Ever.

Wow, if you hate Heidi Montag, then you are going to love the music video for her first single, "Higher." Yeah, I can't believe they let her sing either. And they really shouldn't have, because she is awful. Just really, super terrible.

The only thing I could discern from the first 15 seconds of this video is that it features Heidi Montag in a bikini, rolling around in the sand, and doing a bunch of fake running and giggling. It's just as pathetic as all those staged bikini pictures we've seen her in.

Apparently the only thing she knows how to do well is wear a bikini. I stopped watching after 15 seconds because it's really that awful. But I'm glad I kept watching, because it actually gets worse. Also, the whole thing was shot by her douchebag boyfriend Spencer Pratt, which makes the whole thing so much better, and so much worse. It's so bad. I mean really, really, really, bad. You'll love it.

You can expect a heidi montag sex tape to follow shortly, I'd bet.

Watch the Videos:

Heidi Montag "Higher" Music Video

Heidi Montag "Higher" Music Video - Making Of

Here are some of the photos taken during this video shoot. Hit the link for more of these Heidi Montag bikini pictures.

Photo credit: Pacific Coast News

Link: Heidi Montag's "Higher" Music Video is Horrible, Has Bikinis

Heidi Montag Goes Ass Up

01:37 PM, Filed under: Home \ Celebrities \ Heidi Montag

No, that's not Deja Vu you're feeling, it's just yet another set of completely staged Heidi Montag bikini pictures. I don't know who she thinks she's fooling, but I guess it's the effort that counts.

Of course, with those newly permantently pouty lips of hers, these pictures look like they were taken on the set of a softcore couples porn video. Although, judging by the recent "enhancements" to Heidi's figure, that may well be what she was going for. Or was it her pimp/boyfriend's idea?

Anyway, there's about a bazillion pictures of Heidi Montag showing off her increasingly fake figure, face, and life, after the jump. And yes, I realize that I have once again fallen into her trap, hook, line and hooker, I mean sinker. So, if you're as incapable of looking away as I am, you'll probably enjoy it.

Photo credit: Pacific Coast News

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Heidi Montag Topless Pictures from Maxim

05:13 AM, Filed under: Home \ Celebrities \ Heidi Montag

If you pick up the February issue of Maxim magazine you'll find Heidi Montag topless inside. Which seems logical, considering she payed a lot of money for her new boobs (and nose, and lips). But for some reason, even though she is topless, she's still covering herself up.

I don't get it. If you went to all that trouble to stuff your chest full of plastic, don't you want people to see the results? I mean, we can all see her new nose, and her new lips, which are just awful, so why is she covering up her new breasts?

Whatever, I'm sure you could open up the boob job catalogue and see them anyway. I think her's are the ones on page 74.

Oh, Heidi also talks about The Hills, and Lauren Conrad in her interview, but I'm sure that's why you'll be picking up the magazine.

Link: Heidi Montag Topless Pictures from Maxim

Heidi Montag's Lips Exploded!

11:42 AM, Filed under: Home \ Celebrities \ Heidi Montag

Heidi Montag just added fake lips to her list of fake body parts. For those of you who are keeping count, that's fake breasts, a fake nose, and now fake lips. She's not even recognizable anymore. She looks like a Barbie doll that was held under a magnifying glass in the sun.

I don't know why she thinks these ghastly lips are an improvement. Heidi Montag actually used to be pretty. Now she just looks like someone with really low self esteem, and nothing good to do with her daddy's money.

Hey Heidi, if you want anyone to believe that you're not 100% fake, maybe you should stop becoming an android piece by piece.

More pictures of Heidi Montag and her fake new lips after the jump.

Photo credit: Pacific Coast News

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Heidi Montag Bikini Videos Mean a Heidi Montag Sex Tape Can't Be Far Away

02:04 PM, Filed under: Home \ Celebrities \ Heidi Montag

Here's Heidi Montag in her bikini, back on the beach, doing the same fake posing she always does, but this time there's a little something different. Instead of running in the sand with her, Heidi's douchebag boyfriend, Spencer Pratt is behind a video camera, probably working on Heidi's super-low-budget music video. Either that or they're taping the intro to the inevitable Heidi Montag sex tape.

No, there isn't a Heidi Montag sex tape yet (at least not that I know of), but if ever there was an obvious couple to find in a sex tape, you know it's these two media whores. What else do you think that camera's for? After all, she paid a lot of money for those fake breasts of hers, and we know Spencer just bought himself a shiny new camera. They've got to get their money back somehow.

And if you need any more convincing that they are totally getting ready for a sex tape, just look at Heidi practicing the Doggy Style position and her "O" face.

More Heidi Montag bikini pictures after the jump.

Photo credit: Pacific Coast News

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